“If you are looking for sympathy you’ll find it between shit and syphilis in the dictionary.”
– David Sedaris
These letters are mostly to my father, Flynt. He was a larger than life kinda guy who struggled with a dependency on alcohol for most of his adult life. It ended his marriage. It destroyed his health and vibrancy. It eventually ended his life. He was only 55. I was still a kid when Flynt wandered off into that great pool hall in the sky. This blog is my attempt at mending the father daughter relationship that Flynt’s alcoholism also destroyed.
These virtual letters are my way of finally saying all of the things that I never had an opportunity to say. Maybe after someone is gone is not the best time to build a healthy, loving relationship. Perhaps closure can only be obtained with the living. Maybe, after someone dies, it is indeed too late. But, maybe not.
I see this not as a memorial, but a living conversation with my first love. A man I must believe would have always been there for me, if the alcohol hadn’t been there for him. I hope to eventually get past the hurt and regret and be able to have an open communication with this man who will continue to be my only Dad, even if he has ceased to be.
Read more about Letters I Will Never Send here.